I wondered if I will meet my soul mate throughout my life. If I managed to find, it seems pretty cool~ A soul mate not necessary need to be your lover, crush or your other half. The person can be an opposite gender, can be gay, lesbian, black, white, blind, healthy or whatever. They can even be someone who you only met for once in your lifetime!
Wouldn't it be great if you can find someone that cliques well with you?? Someone who knows you well from inside out. Well, more than your parents or spouse or lover.
Truthfully speaking, nobody know me well enough. My mum do not really know me from heart... :/ Even I dont know myself sometimes either.
Im kind of screwed up in my way of thinking and it is not the correct way to flaunt that to everyone wtf. So if someone really knows, if not, they wont know... Sometimes I do not even know if I know how am I feeling. I am really lost and confused and who can I lean on??
No one gives a good reply. Most just give general 'correct' answers that I also am thinking. Parents just assumed that I am unmotivated and cannot make it. In the end, there is really no one to back me up in a good manner. Yes, sometimes they are supportive but during the crucial times, they are not.
Parents just wants me to control me yet wanting me to be independent and be confident. That is contradicting. Please, I know what I am doing and can you all please do this favour to just let me do what I want? I am old enough for god's sake. Sometimes I just get so fed up with all the white lies that I had been telling. I just want to tell them to ignore me, treat me like invisible for a day or two. I WOULD GLADY APPRECIATE THAT PLEASE. Do not question, do not emphasize.
All I want is freedom and well, people who understands and supports. Hard to even confide to people when I am feeling confused. So parts and pieces of me are shown to different people. Where is the real me??! Soul searching but still no idea. I am screwed up, no one will be like me. Really, if someone understands, I will be really grateful and relieved!